Reduce Anxiety About Decison Making
What's the alternative to making decisions? Allowing someone else, or circumstances, to make them for you. And that is giving up control of your life. That's giving up all power to your life to other people or circumstance. And that will make you miserable It reminds me of walking through a wonderful food buffet where you could have anything you want -- 0 calories! -- and allowing someone else to decide what you took on your plate. Unacceptable! So when faced with decision anxiety, is the alternative ? giving up all control to others or circumstance ? the preferred method? Definitely not. No matter how difficult the decision, making it yourself gives you some modicum of control. On the flip side, of course, it also gives you the responsibility, and therefore you can't blame anyone else. Let's consider that. Does it make you feel better to blame someone else? For example, you have a really bad haircut, and you decide it's the hairstylist fault because she talked you into it. Ok, so now you've correctly affixed the blame -- do you still have a bad haircut? So what did it accomplish? Nothing. Instead, consider this: You have a bad haircut because you thought this was the style that you wanted, but now you see that it's not for you. You still have the haircut, but since you've accepted your part in it, it empowers you ? instead of making you a victim to it. Being a victim to a decision emasculates you. Being a participator in a decision empowers you. To reduce anxiety for your decisions, keep this in mind: 1. Stop looking for a prediction of the future. There's a difference in making a decision and looking for a prediction. There is likely to be a risk in most any decision more complicated than deciding on a type of dessert. Things change, people change, ideas change, desires change. The decision is made on what you know, what you believe, what direction you want to go in. The future cannot be predicted. Don't let that stop you. 2. Be as informed as possible before making a decision. Do what you need to do, but try to be realistic about it. For example, if you tried to read every article on decision anxiety, you'd be 100 years old before you finished ? not much help, there, huh. So if you find yourself procrastinating, give yourself a time limit --"I will read 50 different articles, and talk to 10 people, and decide by 5:00 pm on Thursday." 3. Realize that very few things are set in stone. Maybe you have lots of things you want to do in your life, and you just seem to make a decision on what to do or how to do them all. This is "analysis-paralysis". Instead, remind yourself that focusing on one thing right now doesn't mean that you're giving up others. It simply means that you have decided to get started on one project, with the realization that you can do the others at any time you choose. 4. Remind yourself of successful decisions. One of my clients didn't believe that she could make any good decisions until we started her keeping a list of the many good decisions she made every day. Sure some were small, but throughout her life, she began to realize that she had made many more good decisions than bad ones. Easier decision making is really about valuing yourself and your own opinions. Believe in your ability, and trust your instincts. Appreciate your input into your decisions, and understand and accept that every single decision you make might not be perfect. Learn from it, expect the best from yourself, and you'll get the best. About The Author Kathy Gates is a Professional Life Coach in Scottsdale Arizona. What is Life Coaching? Your life -- only easier, happier, more joyful! Learn more at www.reallifecoach.com for products and services and sign up for her free newsletter. kathy@reallifecoach.com
Related News
|
 |
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
Smelling the Roses: Better Living Through Savoring
"Stop and smell the roses," people often say. Then they smile ruefully, because everybody knows there isn't enough TIME to stop or, as my daughter says, to "chill."
Executive Coaching and the American President
Perhaps no one better than a former U.S. president has the right to advise executives:
"The best executive is the one who has sense enough to pick good men to do what he wants done, and self-restraint enough to keep from meddling with them while they do it." -Theodore Roosevelt
Boost Your Self-Esteem
What Is Self-Esteem?
Diverse Marketing Strategies for Those Living with Disabilities
Imagine yourself as the only means of financially supporting you. A little scary isn't it? In today's economy, it is difficult living on a single income. This is especially true for individuals living in Howard County, although what a great place to call home. People will gladly exchange dollars, for the exceptional quality of life, provided by a county, tucked away in the middle of the beautiful State of Maryland.
Time Travel
Let me quote something you wrote. "When you reach the boundary between like and love, you know you are entering a different country. You are beyond newness and infatuation. You know what Shakespeare meant when he called love 'an ever-fixed mark that looks on tempests and is never shaken.'"
Throw a No-Heat Party for the Planet
Is it really possible to have loads of fun, and help the planet at the same time?
Do You Trust Your Mentor(s)?
It is better to suffer wrong than to do it, and happier to be sometimes cheated than not to trust." - Samuel Johnson
What Dost Thou Speaketh? Hey, Affirm This Way!
Articulating repetitive statements with emotion will inevitably connect you to your primary focus. Your destiny is guaranteed, when you repeatedly, decree a seed. How can I make such bold statements? Because ancient wisdom showed me years ago, "As a Fran thinketh (and speaketh); so is she."
Keeping Your Anger Under Control
In my work with individuals and couples, I see many people who have a difficult time expressing and managing angry feelings. Let's take a look at what causes people to become angry and how they can respond to stressful situations more productively.
Curbing the Public Nuisance (Part 2)
Yes, that pillar of society that has been with us since that slithery dude threw humanity for a curve in the Garden of Eden ? that cornerstone of society has been automated.
Among the Purpose & Personality
I have one magical thought, lets see it more closely. Every one has purpose of life. Some holds good for self, family, a society, state, nation, religion, world, etc.
The Tolerance Effect
While working with a client several months ago, we went through a process of identifying areas of personal strengths and weaknesses. Through this exercise, we discussed various characteristics and ended up deciding that there was opportunity for improvement in her level of "tolerance". A funny thing happened after that. When she found herself in a situation that had previously triggered a negative reaction be it disappointment, irritation, frustration, anger or even animosity (usually focused on the person in the car ahead of her who didn't use their turn signal), the word "tolerance" would flash in her head and she could immediately change the way she reacted to the situation.
Viewpoints - Communication Destruction Or....
Viewpoints! Everyone has them and they are personal. However, when you believe that only your view is correct, you shut out other people and do not listen to the facts they are giving.
Should I Get A Coach?
Why should or would someone hire a life coach? Well, why would anyone purchase the services of a personal trainer, and interior designer or a sports coach - any professional "assistant" for that matter? After all, we all know how to exercise, how to hang a curtain and how to play our own game. But we hire a professional because we know that they will hold us accountable on our goals and objectives - and since we're paying good money for them to be there, often whether we show up or not, we have an added incentive to do so ourselves. We also understand that even though our knowledge of what we're doing may be strong, a professional always has tips, tools and tricks at their disposal which can save us time, aggravation and money. And we get that even the best of best can't "see themselves" from the outside and don't have the objective standpoint about their skills and abilities that a trained and experienced professional can bring to bear on any given situation.
5 Minute Morning Balance Ritual
"3 Questions, 5 Minutes a Day: Make leaps towards greater balance in one single week with the Shicka Boom 5 Minute Morning Balance Ritual"
By Laura Lallone, Certified Life Coach
Empowering Vision
Playing Our Part:
Tips For Singles On Celebrating The New Year
It's four weeks away and you don't have any plans. Many of your friends will be away or out with their significant others. You can't believe it's been a whole year and you are facing another dateless New Years Eve. What can you do?
Choosing The Right Coach
Coaching has become a very popular way for people to get the ongoing support they need to accomplish their goals. However, choosing a coach can be tricky. There are so many METHODS, models, and approaches. Coaches come from every background possible -- from counseling to consulting to corporate America. And each individual has a PERSONALITY, communication style, and temperament that is going to match well with some people and clash with others. So how do you choose someone who is right for you?
Executive Coaching and Effective Learning
We've all been through training events-workshops, seminars, and courses that didn't affect our behavior as much as we would have preferred. And while each provides valuable information and tools for increased productivity, most of us also understand what happens after the workshop is over. We return to our work, our offices, our lives-and the principles we learned are swept aside by a tidal wave of meetings, projects, and commitments. If we're motivated, we find a moment to reflect on and consolidate a couple of relevant points, but industry studies show that most new learning is lost within a few days of the event-as much as 90% in some cases. So what's the solution?
Corporate Coaching - Why Coach? C(5)+ED
Is it possible to make a strong "business case for corporate coaching?" Why is coaching vital to organizations? Why should leaders invest time developing their coaching skills? These are tough, important questions that organizations should consider before implementing coaching.
|
